A first date is your first real-life interaction with a potential partner. Understandably, it may be stressful, and things do not always go as planned. You may feel awkward or shy. The other person may look nothing like their profile photo. Whatever happens, you often need to improvise. The more you practice, the better you get. Follow these tips to feel more comfortable if thing go awry. As a matter of fact, these techniques come from the art of improvisation comedy. What is applicable on stage, works for dating.
Psych Yourself Up
An actor consciously chooses the feelings and character traits they will play. They may need to imitate an accent, look sad or excited. Before and during the date, take care of your mindset, as well as appearance. It is not enough to select an outfit that boosting self-confidence. Focus on your emotional state and answer these questions:
- How do I feel now?
- What do I need to let go of to enjoy the date?
This will come in handy when your date is whining about their lousy day at work. Focus on the good wine in your glass and let go of the situation.
Hostility is to be avoided at all costs. Think of the typical “yes, but…” improvisation strategy. First, some information is presented, which players acknowledge as true by saying “yes, but…”. next, they add new details to develop the scene.
No matter how much you dislike your date, make sure your behavior is neither aggressive nor offensive. Refrain from accusations and arguments. After all, if you do not intend to see this person again, why exacerbate the tension? Even if your opponent is entirely wrong, it is better to allow him to think otherwise.
If you are spending the evening in a fancy restaurant, just agree with whatever they say and enjoy your meal and the ambiance of the place. Alternatively, you could test the waters by asking something like “This is very interesting, but what would you say about a different point of view?’
Listen and Respond
On stage, an actor reacts to others’ phrases to move the show forward. If he stops listening to focus on his next witty remark, he will fail to follow the logic of the scene. Hence, do not get distracted. Listen attentively to what your date says. Avoid yes/no questions. Instead, ask them for details – why, how, when, or where something happened. Everybody loves talking about themselves and will appreciate active listening. In fact, it is highly endearing. This will help you bond faster and your charms will be enhanced.
With active listening, you may not need to contribute much to a conversation you are not enjoying. the other party may end up doing all the talking and enjoying it.
Remember that there are no mistakes. Like improvisation comedy, the events may be totally unpredictable, and it is not your duty to foresee every little thing. Whatever happens, it is a learning experience. Besides, you will never see this person again if you do not want to. Be friendly and do what feels right.